Sasha Darling & The BellJar Blog — Uncategorized

Update to the below morose Sasha Darling. Day two and I'm already over it. I'm tickled pink and having the time of my life. I'm such a moody creature. I think the unglamorous conditions I am forced to travel under mad me sad. Now I am in my beautiful apartment in the loveliest neighborhood and feeling like the princess I am. I need to fly first class from here on out! Telle est la vie!! Sometimes being in the company strangers can be the loneliest of all experiences. I sit on my flight heading towards Paris, with just a few hours of sleep. I have been admittedly burning the candle at both ends. When I am most peaceful, I yearn for solitude and quite times. When things spin out of control I become chaotic. I have been a victim of this chaos the past few months. It’s interesting to watch the spiral of events that have brought me to this plane and to what feels like somewhat of an emotional setback. I have been working so hard the past 4 years, and I have reached burnout. I want to do more, I want to achieve more, but my distressed emotional state has told me I am at my breaking point. And instead of taking care, I have been going out, to distract myself from my upset. I feel hollow as a burnt out tree. I have nothing left to give. It sometimes feels as if there are a thousand people looking to me, counting on me, wanting a piece of me. I have felt angry that no one has noticed how fragile I have become under my stealth armor of coolness. My sunny disposition is being worn like a mask. I wonder who is looking to give back to me? Moving to LA has been such a priority to me. I have been yearning to open a new store, to start a new life, but the right situation has not presented itself. I have felt let down by business partners, weary of deals and for one of the first times ever, and I am not clear which way to move next. I am cornered like a cat. I have been looking for life changing answers but instead I found a trip to Paris. I sit here, on this plane, feeling bereft at my current situation. Still I am hopeful. In the past these life changing situations have presented themselves at just the right moment to help strengthen my resolve. I am sure this is one of those moments. I am connected to a source that is bigger than my temporarily frail soul. I sit here amongst these strangers knowing that what lies beyond this vast sea, is the clarity, and the strength that will restore my power; the source that holds all the beauty of my uniqueness. I leave my life that has been causing me so much confusion, to find myself somewhere down the windy cobblestone streets of Paris. I will meet myself at the Rive Seine where the night lights flood ripples of water with tiny flecks of color. If I have to search all of the archaic and bountiful crevices of Paris I will find myself again.

This is seriously one of the most amazing shows BelllJar has had, thanks to miss Kylea Borges. I happen to be the happy owner of one of her pieces already. Make sure you all come out, I think it's gonna be a bot crazy so come early for Electric Kool-Aid cocktails. Crazy Psychedelic kids. XO Group show featuring artists: Juliette Oken, Aaron Rodriguez, Sarah Applebaum & Kylea Borges Show Runs: July 15th - August 9th “Precipice” is inspired by the saturation and special effects of psychedelic movies from the early 1960’s and late 70’s. Drug induced dream sequences disconnect hyper-color worlds and space from their context. Before the use of computer animation technology, artists worked to create hand painted lunar landscapes and with tinted gels for effects. This grouping of artists and their work seek to reclaim that lost art in a new way with a fresh perspective. Juliette Oken Bay area based artist and designer Juliette Oken creates works that depict dreamscapes with combined use of collage, colored pencil, gouache and screen-printing. Her science fiction inspired landscapes come out of reflections on the relationship that humans have with nature, and with life as a perpetual state of metamorphosis. A pervasive fascination with culture and the iconographic-signifiers that construct our human mythology get integrated into her narrative dreamscapes with intergalactic storms, black magic deities, space caverns, horizons and mountains unfolding infinitely extending patterns. Juliette received a BFA in Painting/Drawing in 2006 from the California College of Arts and she is currently managing an active art studio space in San Francisco for graphic illustration, design, print-customization and for the production for her screen-print based décor project, STARCADE DESIGNS. starcadedesigns.blogspot.c​om Aaron Rodriguez Aaron Rodriguez is a San Francisco based artist that uses tradition cut and paste collage techniques to create alternate realities. In an attempt to steer away from any sort of digital crutch the artist manually cuts out found images and appropriates them as he sees fit. The images range in date from the early 1900's to the 70's and are usually repeated making the original image hard to recognize. Aaron’s work spans black and white optical illusion to surreal hyper-color, taking images out of their original context and placing them in a world all their own. aaronxaaron.blogspot.com Sarah Applebaum Artist Sarah Moli Newton Applebaum lives and works in San Francisco, California. Internationally recognized, her work has been exhibited all over the world and including La Triennale Di Milano Design Museum in Milan and the San Jose Institute for Contemporary Art here in California. She has been featured in a diversity of books and publications throughout China, North and South America and Europe. Applebaum's new-psych work has played a key part in reinvigorating installation and soft sculpture through her use of textiles in contemporary art. SarahApplebaum.com Kylea Borges San Francisco based artist, Kylea Borges, has worked with both collage and textiles from a young age. Inspired by the crafts of both her mother and grandmother, she began experimenting with visual and physical textures as a kid which eventually led her to a career in both art and clothing. Kylea’s work utilized techniques such as weaving paper to create unusual textures and depth in her work. Currently her inspiration is found in pairing natural patterns and designs with geometric forms. KyleaBorges.com

I've been thinking a lot about this concept that I'm trying to grasp. It's the principle of allowing other people to be and do what makes them fulfilled and not letting it affect my experience. I have a very strong sense of self. Being positive about myself, the things I'm working on accomplishing etc. It's very easy for me to stay focused and positive about the things I have control over: my business, my body, my soul, my home. But it's very difficult for me to be unaffected by the actions of outsiders. Baby steps. I have been working on not being affected by strangers. Like if a crazy person yells at you, or if someone is rude to you at the grocery store etc. It's easy for me to just shrug these instances off and recognize its that persons experience and I don't need to react or get involved in their negative outlook- I can blissfully be on my way. But for those that are more involved and close to my life...it seams nearly impossible to deflect their emotions, intentions, actions and or behaviors. And now I'm wondering if it's even possible? I do believe that when you have such a strong iron clad sense of self it really shouldn't matter what other people are doing or feeling around you. You are secure in your own little world. But is that not just another defense mechanism meant to keep people out? Is it even human to not be affected by the actions of others? On one hand it's something I would really like to master; there is nothing worse then sitting around feeling bad based on actions that are completely beyond your control, but, on the other hand, people I have been involved with have accused me of being too emotionally cut off. I'm not sure it's the same thing, but I'm pondering it all today? The ability to confidently and honestly let people in, but not be too devastated if this experience does not go the way you had envisioned. I'm not even sure if this makes any sense. But I do know that, everyday I'm striving to be a more evolved and happier person. Can any of you live your life in an honest way and not be affected by the actions of others? Can you truly allow?

This morning a I woke to an email that simply stated "I love you". I do not know the sender of this email, and the context is a bit is obscured. But the meaning is unimportant. We should all wake to such messages on a daily basis. To start the day with a message of love, what could be better? It would be life changing? It could be be world changing. We are all surrounded, inundated, absorbed by so much negativity and emotional neglect it's amazing that we muddle through with the faintest smile. So to you I say, today — turn off your TV, put down the paper, shy away from the negative chatter that fills most halls, and know deep in your heart that you are loved. I love you. I love you when you are perfect. I love you when you feel seemingly flawed. I love you when you talk to much and I love you when you are terribly witty. I love you when you cut me off in traffic and give me the bird. I love you when you offer me your spot in line for no apparent reason. I love as you grow and move, have babies, get wrinkly and gain a few lbs. I love you when you are dressed to kill. I even love you when you are wearing flats. I love you even when when you don't love me back. I love you when it's really hard to tell — we all have our testy moments. With any luck I will love you for the rest of my life.

I'm waiting to fall in love- Not desperately and not anxiously, not even patiently. Just simply waiting. I'm not one of those girls that is constantly whining about, whats wrong with guys in San Francisco, blah blah blah. I just join the dating frenzy and I have fun. I go out with guys, I make out, I have fun times in the park, fancy dinners out, trips to the museums, day trips to the country and it's all ridiculously cute and fun. But of course the goal is to find a bestfriend, at the risk of sounding like hippie, a soul mate. Someone to hang with in pj's on Sundays, someone to run through fields with, someone to drive me home if I get to tipsy, someone to travel the world with, someone who is an adventure junkie like me. A guy who is fearless and ferociously smart. Someone who I will wake up next to and feel at home. He will be tall and lovely, altruistic but motivated. He will think I'm at my most beautiful when I'm simple. He will see through all my silly girlie glamour and know that I'm just a small town country girl. He will take me on picnics and tickle me till I scream. I have always imagined I would settle down with a European. I mean what girl doesn't have a crush on a cute Brit with a crooked smile or a dashing dark skinned Italian with thick hair and a smooth line? Who doesn't like to be called bella or bird? So off to Europe I go at the end of the month first time in almost forever. In my dreams my nights will be filled with long walks down windy cobblestone alleys in ridiculously high heels, late night dinners fueled by too much red wine, even later night dance parties wearing only underwear (this may have happened in Italy already), and some serious flirting with cuties from oversea. Who knows, maybe I will never come home. 87" />