Sasha Darling & The BellJar Blog — Uncategorized

Those who know me well, would probably describe me as one of the most confident, strong willed girls in the world. I would also describe myself as such. I, like all humans have my short comings, but I can honestly say that on an average day, I wake up, feel beautiful, happy and fulfilled. I really do love my life, my body, my mind, my soul, my friends, family and above all I love BellJar. Part of what has made running a boutique so rewarding is my own personal experience shopping Boutiques. It has had a huge affect on how I run BellJar. I found that most Boutiques carry nothing above a size 6 and I often ended up in their dressing rooms crying out of frustration. I have always been proud that curvier customers can come in to my store and find beautiful things that fit their bodies and that I have a sale-staff that is helpful and knowledgeable. That all comes from being a curvy lady myself.   I of course have my bad days. Even a size two girl feels fat sometimes. Ragging hormones, PMS, a week vacation lacking exercise, a bad break-up, reading Hollywood tabloids, just about anything can send us crazy girls in to a shame spiral. My earlier post rang of a girl having that kind of day.  I got to work and was thumbing through the new V magazine that Jaz brought to the shop and there was an article about fashion returning to curves. We started googling Crystal Renn and it's funny, as lovely as she is, in some photos, I still felt myself thinking, maybe she could loose a few lbs. But really that's because I have been trained to view a body like hers as unfit. And that's just ridiculous. She is perfect. I personally work out often, I eat healthy, but I NEVER starve myself. I do not take diet pills, and I think fad diets are for crazy people. Fasting is for spiritual enlightenment and doing drugs is for losers both skinny and fat. As long as we are eating healthy and working out, then we are the size we should be and that is a beautiful thing.  Crystal says of her experience with a changing body- At 17 my body completely rebelled. I couldn't loose more weight and I realized I was going to die for a job. The next day I was completely chastised by my agency for my size and one agent pulled me aside and said, 'There's an option for you. You can either go plus-size or do commercial work.' And I asked, 'What's plus-size modeling? I've never heard of that.' And she said, Well it means you can be whatever size you want and model.' But she said it was for old women! But for whatever reason, everything made sense and I knew this was the route I had to take. I went and had a salad with salmon and walnuts and olive oil. I gave into what my body needed. I could be healthy and happy and still model. Not to mention she still works with the likes of Vogue, Glamour, on the runway with Jean Paul Gaultier and in ads for Dolce & Gabbana.  So, in regards to my earlier post - I still want a personal assistant, but only to eat yummy healthy food with and maybe accompany me on fun exercise excursions like shopping, merchandising my store and yoga class here and there. As for being a Vegan and staying away from horribly unethically treated animals, well that is very much near and dear to my heart. But I'm currently ready for my Maxim Cover right now. I don't need your help there. I have never met a boy that did not love my body as is...and I tell you what, I love it too. So sorry to all my ladies who read my earlier post. Viva la bodies, all bodies. All healthy happy and lovely bodies. Workout, eat well, and care for yourself!

There are many things I aspire to be that at times feel so unattainable. I would love to be a work out fanatic and have even convinced myself, in the past, that I am. By convincing, I mean hiring an overpriced personal trainer to kick my ass for fifty dollars an hour three times a week. And at that cost I certainly was not going to let my lazy behind sit on the couch watching reality T.V. One thing I don’t need to aspire to be is a girl good with her cash. You miss three of those sessions and that’s a pair of new shoes, wasted. When I had a trainer it was pretty easy to go the gym two or three days a week on my own, as I felt motivated and pumped from our sessions. And after two years and who knows how much money, I thought I was one of those work out crazed people you see on late night T.V. adds. But it’s amazing how quickly, the threat of monetary loss being gone, can kill a girls motivation. Now it’s not that I don’t still work out, because I do. Sometimes as much as 6 days a week, but then there are those weeks that I only go once or twice. It’s the difference between looking like Sophia Loren and the bigger girl from Wilson Philips pre stomach staple. I need to go 6 days a week, always. I also would like to be Vegan or at least Vegetarian. I have seen the movies, I have read the books, and I know how I feel about eating animal products. It’s not so much that I think it’s wrong, but that I am horrified at America farming industry and you should be too. I have been Vegetarian or Vegan on and off my entire life and I always somehow fall off the wagon. So currently, I eat in an ethical farming type way. I purchase meats and dairy products from small farms whose practices fall in the, old school of the earth sort of farming way. In SF it’s pretty easy to eat at restaurants that serve foods that come from these farms, but once again without some sort of obligation, it’s easy, out on a stretch of highway with an empty stomach and 5 bucks in hand, to justify Nachos Bell Grande’s from Taco Bell. Eating ethical meat is the gateway to crap food. I need to just cut it out completely. I would also like to be skinny. I’m not talking Anorexic Skinny; I’m talking more like curvy, sexy skinny, Maxim Cover Skinny. And believe me, when I’m doing the two things mentioned above, that’s what I am. But here is the problem: living my life. When I am a food-obsessed work out maniac I find little time for anything else. I spend all my time at the gym, thinking about what I’m going to eat, not wanting to go out with friends, travel or do anything that will deter me from the path to health and happiness. And then I end up feeling lonely and unhappy. It’s a balancing act that I somehow have not been able to master. I refuse to read one more book on how I should eat, or how many times a week I should gym my way to a skinny ass. What I want to know is how can I find that happy medium? How can I travel and eat out and drink a beer and still be healthy, socially conscience and look like a goddess? After much though on the subject, I have surmised that I need a personal assistant. It’s way easier for me to stay on my path, but not go overboard when I have a partner keeping me on track. Morning walks, healthy home cooked dinners, encouragement to order the yummy beet salad over the Cowgirl Creamery smothered Prather Ranch burger? That’s what I will pay top dolor for! How much would I need to pay someone to just hang out with me twenty-four-seven and help me make good choices? Any of you out there want to just try it out as an unpaid internship? Sasha Darling’s personal assistant, doesn’t that just sound glamorous? Taking applications…

One of my darling friends Featherheart got married on the fourth up on Lake Michigan. I decided to go out early and hang with her in Detroit do some shopping for the shop and a little for myself too. I personally got like 30 new vintage dresses and then tons of other goodies for the shop. Stop in and check it out next week. Also check out Featherhearts Etsy. She makes organic face and body creams, salves and other amazing goodies. I restocked and I swear my skin already looks smoother and clearer. I particularly love the lavender oil and all the Salves. Detroit was so crazy. I wish I had taken pictures, but I was just so distracted!!! It was completely abandoned and blown out downtown and all the surrounding neighborhoods. There were beautiful amazing 2 story brick and Victorian style houses just burnt out and boarded up. Even downtown had mini skyscrapers that were completely abandoned and empty with broken windows. Within this chaos is a college and all these amazing young artist and musicians struggling to keep their city alive. The amount of pride amongst all the amazing people I met, just totally blew me away and made Detroit on of my favorite cities I have ever been too. It's a cold reminder of urban flight and the country's ability to just turn it's back on a community. But on the flip-side it's also so inspirational to see the creativity and hope that can grow out such a situation. And for those that have not been there, it is a situation. I stayed in a little area outside of downtown, Ferndale that was really cute. It had an artsy cool vibe and the most amazing vintage store Lost and Found. I went crazy there. I was seriously having a heart attack at all the perfect vintage dresses. It was like SF in the early 90's when Wasteland actually sold amazing vintage and everything was like under 50. I DIE!!! Then we headed to the lake. The adorable sales girls at Lost and Found also came to the wedding. Loads of food, lake time, cool old restaurants, a Parade in the downtown of this cute little all American town called Harbor Springs, not to mention a lot of drinking, fire building and all around country goodness. Also got to hang with my best friend Christel, who although lives in the same city as me, we never get to hang out. Such is the life of busy glamour girls. The bride looked so amazing I just could not get enough of her. Her dress was Vintage and cost 8 dollars. Love it. Her flowers were daisy's and I'm loving her head wreath. I caught the Bouquet after drinking like 6 lynch-berg lemon-aides. Last time I did that I was married within the year. I'm just saying.

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